I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize