You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I think we might need a safe word for this...
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
