you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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