Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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