for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
