Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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