Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
