That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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