READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
