can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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