the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize