HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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