I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize