That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
