She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
