The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
