My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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