Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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