Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
