I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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