found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
