just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
