he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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