i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
