Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
