It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize