textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
