I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
