The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
