Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize