Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
