If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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