i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
