Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
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