We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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