all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
