Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
dude i'm inner monologue high
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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