nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
someone get that fucking seahorse.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
