Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
