she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize