dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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