I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
