Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
