I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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