dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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