Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He has the fingertips of a God
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