My brain says no but my pants say off.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
