you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
