Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
my liver is dry heaving
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
