the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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