How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
