Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
The beer is more important than you right now.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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